Compromise

I've been thinking a lot about compromises this week. Everyone says that a marriage is all about compromises -- and that's the truth!

For example, on Saturday, my husband asked me to go with him to a Mixed Martial Arts fight (Rumble in Rahway). Now, we've both been taking Brazilian Jiu Jitsu for about 6 months now, so I do have a background in the sport, and 2 of the competitors were from our dojo. However, seeing 2 guys climb into a cage (yes, CAGE) and fight - box, kickbox, grapple - was not my idea of a fun Saturday night out! But my husband is such a great guy and helps me out so much, I decided to go with him. Much to my surprise, I had a great time! And both of the guys from our dojo won their matches!

What I'm trying to point out here, is that compromise can lead you to unexpected experiences that you really enjoy. And, believe me, compromises don't start after you're married. It's important to open those lines of communication during your engagement - after all, the bride is not the only one of the pair getting married! Discuss all the decisions with each other, and you may just be surprised at the wonderful outcome. Maybe the china pattern isn't the bride's first choice, but with the groom's imput, it will be perfect for your couple's dining room. Perhaps the venue for your reception wouldn't have been on the top of your list, but maybe the one you find together will exceed your expectations. Just listen to each other, and be willing to compromise.

Until next time, happy planning...

Back from Jamaica

My husband and I just went to Jamaica for a very quick 4 day getaway to an all-inclusive in Ocho Rios. While it was snowing here in NJ, we were enjoying the sun and sand -- and the wonderful amenities offered at the all-inclusive. Rum punch, anyone?

While most of my clients' honeymoons are much longer than this 4-day stay, I wanted to pass along some helpful advice:

(1) If you can, add in a couple of days for the travel. It literally took us 12 hours door-to-door to get to and from Jamaica (we couldn't get a direct flight from Newark Airport), so our 4 day stay really turned into 2 full days in Jamaica.

(2) Plan ahead! Check out your resort's website before you go (and PACK), as there may be events going on while you're there that require a different dress code than shorts and flip flops. Also, some restaurants at your resort may require more formal attire.

(3) Try to remember all of your toiletries. We ran out of dental floss and went to the gift shop to purchase one; they wanted $7 for 1 container of dental floss! Needless to say, we skipped the purchase.

(4) Make copies of your important documents and credit cards and take one set with you while leaving another set at home. Also, leave your itinerary with someone at home as well. Hopefully you'll never have to refer to the copies.

(5) Make sure that your passport will be in effect at least 6 months after your return. Apparently, there's a US regulation that could cause you a big headache at Customs if your passport is due to expire in less than 6 months.

Hope these tips help! Until next time, happy planning ...

Band Showcases

I just returned from a bridal show that had 2 bands doing live showcases. I think this is a great way to see and hear bands that you may be considering for your wedding. You get to hear snippets of songs performed in front of a live audience (you!), and can gauge audience reaction, sound quality, performer interaction -- all from the comfort of your chair. The only better way to experience a band is to be a guest at a wedding or event where they are playing.

The other ways to "audition" bands are not so attractive, in my opinion. There's the internet, but sound and audio clips are not the best quality, usually. The promotional materials (such as DVDs and CDs) that a band sends out, unless taped "live," may be edited and the actual performance may not live up to it. Then there's going to another wedding where the band is playing, standing in the back and listening. I think this is so unprofessional; the band has been hired by the couple to entertain their guests, not to bring in outsiders and book more gigs!

So, if you're in the market for a band, check out their website for any upcoming showcases they may be doing in your area. Then, make a date and go enjoy the show!

Until next time, happy planning . . .

Follow the leader

Every one of my clients tells me that one of their goals for their wedding reception is for their guests to have a good time. When I press them to define a "good time," many couples reply that they want their guests to eat really good food and for them to be up and dancing to the entertainment they selected. So, I make recommendations to them for the best reception sites and/or caterers and great bands and djs. The couples then go and select from my recommendations -- the platform is set for everyone at the wedding to have a "good time," right?

Wrong! There is one more ingredient that must be taken into account - one that can't be as easily selected as a good band. It's the guests themselves! You must think about who will be attending your wedding -- their ages and personalities. Are most of your guests older family members who prefer to sit and talk with other relatives that they haven't seen in a while, or are they twenty-somethings who go clubbing every weekend? For the most part, the guests will drive how the party unfolds. However, YOU, the bride & groom, can set the stage, so to speak. If you want a packed dance floor all night, make sure that you are leading the dance sets! Guests follow the bride & groom's lead, so go out and enjoy yourselves and everyone else will join you on the Conga line!

Until next time, happy planning ...